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Sep 02, 2004 07:12 AM
by Andrew Smith

The Washington Post's Style Invitational once again asked readers to take 
any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing 
one letter, and supply a new definition.

Here are the 2003 winners:

1. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you 
realize it was your money to start with.

2. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.

3. Bozone: The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas 
from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of 
breaking down in the near future.

4. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of 
getting someone into bed.

5. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject 
financially impotent for an indefinite period.

6. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.

7. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person 
who doesn't get it.

8. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.

9. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.

10. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)

11. Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really 
bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a 
serious bummer.

12. Decafalon: The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only 
things that are good for you.

13. Glibido: All talk and no action.

14. Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they 
come at you rapidly.

15. Arachnoleptic fit: The frantic dance performed just after you've 
accidentally walked through a spider web.

16. Beelzebug: Satan in the form of a mosquito! that gets into your bedroom 
at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.

17. Caterpallor: The color you turn after finding half a grub in the fruit 
you're eating.

And the pick of the literature:

18. Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an ass.

Andrew W. Smith
DINKY DAU: Vietnamese term for "crazy."

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

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