Theos-Talk Archives (November 2002 Message tt00885)

Here's something funny that I saw at work.

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Why did the Chicken cross the road?

PAT BUCHANAN

To steal a job from a decent, hardworking American.

JERRY FALWELL

Because the chicken was gay! Isn't it obvious? Can't you people see the
plain truth in front of your face? The chicken was going to the "other
side." That's what "they" call it the "other side." Yes, my friends,
that chicken is gay. And, if you eat that chicken, you will become gay
too. I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination
that the liberal media whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrase like
"the other side." That chicken should not be free to cross the road.
It's as plain and simple as that. 

DR. SEUSS

Did the chicken cross the road?
Did he cross it with a toad?
Yes! The chicken crossed the road,
but why it crossed, I've not been told!

ERNEST HEMINGWAY

To die. In the rain.

MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.

I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads
without having their motives called into question.

GRANDPA

In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told
us that the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.

ARISTOTLE

It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

KARL MARX

It was a historical inevitability.

SADDAM HUSSEIN

This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified in
dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.

RONALD REAGAN

What chicken?

CAPTAIN JAMES T. KIRK

To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.

FOX MULDER

You saw it cross the road with your own eyes. How many more chickens
have to cross before you believe it?

FREUD

The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road
reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.

BILL GATES

I have just released eChicken 2000, which will not only cross roads, but
will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook
and Internet Explorer is an inextricable part of eChicken.

EINSTEIN

Did the chicken really cross the road or did the road move beneath the
chicken?

BILL CLINTON

I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What do you mean by
chicken"? Could you define "chicken" please?

GEORGE W. BUSH

I don't think I should have to answer that question.

LOUIS FARRAKHAN

The road, you will see, represents the black man. The chicken crossed
the "black man" in order to trample him and keep him down.

THE BIBLE

And God came down from the heavens, and He said unto the chicken, "Thou
shalt cross the road." And the chicken crossed the road, And there was
much rejoicing.

COLONEL SANDERS

I missed one?