Theos-Talk Archives (September 2001 Message tt00078)

(I wrote this a few of months ago)


The recent cyber war we had on our list, reminded me of a good such like
story I got myself involved in. This was 1975, and to understand the
background, it was some time after the 1973 war, which started on October,
and lasted actually till May or June 1974, when a cease fire was declared
with Syria, too. I served in the army most of the time, and Baba took well
advantage of the circumstance, to instill in my mind the origin of war and
its cure. We know quite well that selfishness is its cause, but it goes even
deeper. I was shown that this is almost the only way for the average
people, loosing their lives for the welfare of others. While during their
daily routine, humans think only how to take advantage of the other; this
state they call *peace*, but this is another story. In short, it was quite
obvious for me that the failures of spiritual people is the
key cause for all this misery. At least this what I was shown over many
years of participating in non stop wars. You cannot actually blame the
ignorant masses, they don't have any spiritual leadership for guidance.
After I was released, I was actually dazed for six months, but after the
shock of that
experience was subsiding, I launched myself to what I called *my spiritual
mission*. I was hot tempered, impatient and had no tolerance for so called
spiritual failures, well I was also a bit younger, and time is a key factor
for wisdom.... So I abandoned my work, or worked only part time, and
dedicated myself to all kinds of volunteer work, first I would help those
who were wounded in the war, which was a hard sight; on of the survivors had
half head. Have you seen a man walking with half head? later on I was sent
in that rehabilitation hospital to aid those on the recovery process, mainly
victims of car accidents and strokes, but later on I discovered that the
spiritual organization I was involved before coming to Baba, i.e. the
Anthroposophical society, have had institutions for helping retarded
children, so of course, I preferred to volunteer there. I spent some time
with one institution in Beer Sheva, south of the country, and quite quickly
I went on odds with the woman in charge. She was a volunteer or was a paid
worker from Switzerland, as were most of the volunteers there, since the
headquarters of the Anthroposophical movement has been in Dornach,
Switzerland. I don't recall really the details of my complaints, and it
doesn't matter whether it had substantial grounds or not, what mattered was
that I saw that if you are a spiritual person, and you don't put your life
and soul into your work, and if not everything is *perfect*, you will be
responsible for the next war, not less. This was my state of mind then. In a
way it is true, but not the whole truth. When I left the institute, I
started a whole crusade around that issue, getting on odds with all my
associates, was blamed for being unloving and judgmental. But I was quite
tenacious, and the understanding of my mental state after the war can
explain that spiritual intolerance, I could see that your failures create
suffering, and *half head* was before my eyes constantly. This *war* was
going on for a few months. I was discussing it with others, sending letters
etc. I got only more and more furious about the whole thing, which, to be
honest, I don't remember for sure today what was
it all about.... Anyway, after some time I was working at my parents
property. We had a chicken house, and I was reparing the roof, standing on
the top of a tall ladder, and the whole thing came back. I said to the Lord:
"I'll never forgive them for this"; as soon as the thought crossed my mind,
the ladder simply vanished under my feet, in an instant I managed to grab
hold of one of the beams, and landed safely on the ground. That was the
changing point. I realized that the Lord was displeased about the whole
thing all along, but He had no access to convey His wish. I was developing
large wounds from every little scratch, which usually heals within a few
days, but the wounds didn't heal at all. I started to send letters of
apology to the people concerned, which helped a bit. At that time I was in
close touch with the head of the Anthroposophical group in Tel Aviv, a
person whom I admired a lot; I just found, while leafing through my
papers, a letter which he sent
me during May, 1975. He wrote: "... I see that you overcoming all this issue
on the hard, but the correct way. It is important, as I can see from
your words, that there is a difference between the people and the
anthroposophy.... etc". I was assimilating this for many years, being extra
cautios not to tread again on toes, which is extremely difficult, but I
think (and hope) that I have learnt, on the hard way, as usuall.
Love, Etzion