Theos-Talk Archives (July 1998 Message tt00109)

Dear KPJ:
Thanks for your extensive comments on this issue and for the responses
they initiated.  Stuff that was formerly nebulous concepts is
chrystalizing for me and I have some short comments (because I made some
pretty assumptive statements myself on this issue)
K. Paul Johnson wrote:
>
>  I was sad to see Brenda get jumped on, very sad to learn of
> Alan's difficult situation, and irritated by the assumptions
> behind several comments earlier by Alan and Thoa.  Generally this
> whole situation has made me so uncomfortable with the list that
> I've considered signing off for a while.

a)  Practically EVERYONE who made a comment greater than one line of any
substance got JUMPED on.  I've spent a lifetime at work and in voluntary
organizations wondering in frustation why people just don't come right
out and say what they feel, think or posit.  I'd sit there, fluctuating
between meditating, daydreaming and controlling my tongue, thinking,
"are these people for real (and how did I end up on this planet)?  Get
them alone and they'll burn your ear off with opinions, questions,
complaints and suggestions for solutions.  Put them in a group and they
pussy foot around each other being specific about nothing."

NOW I know *why* definitively and I NEVER have to waste my intellect on
this one again.

b)  Irritation is part of the human condition.  One person's assumption
is another's truth.

c)  Until human-kind stops it's knee jerk reaction of wanting to avoid
everything that makes it feel uncomfortable ..... (finish the sentence)

People in general are severely dis-eased with c).
Two husbands and dozens of male managers have criticized, disciplined
and emotionally abused me all in the name of not wanting to feel
uncomfortable.  Here's a typical comment....."I DON'T want to hear about
problems you may be encountering AS I AM STRESSED TO FEEL RESPONSIBLE
THAT I SHOULD CARE AND DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT.  If I GOT IT BACK, I MUST
HAVE GIVEN IT OUT!
In the workplace, in relationships and in SOCIETY this results in
non-communication and crisis management, SEPARATENESS.
Generally, people who are living from a position of strength from
within, spirituality, and LOVE, immediately respond with something like,
"I understand how you feel, I empathize", and then the intellect starts
to find ways to help solve the problem.
I really no longer care what any book or dogma says.  There's living
proof and evidence coming out of our ying yang, that some
acknowlegement, empathy, support, followup, however un-material or
material, ascends the individual and heals the race.

> First: I was so startled by the suggestion that some individual
> here might have a spare $130,000 to donate for a good cause that
> like so many others, I just passed it by without knowing what to
> make of it.

So was I.  I first thought, "what an impossible task".  Then I thought,
"this is what life is all about".  Then I did the math and broke it down
into manageable pieces.  Both material and spiritual manageable pieces!

> and not very subtly called anyone not offering you help a bad
> Theosophist, was irritating.  Helping unemployed people buy a
> house worth more than five times what I can afford while working,
> people I have never met, doesn't feel like my Theosophical duty.

I don't think this was what Alan did.  He questioned the usefulness of
Theosophy in a real life situation.  I don't read any judgement of
individuals in his postings.  What I do think is that when we read these
things, it's like they are directed at us personally.  That's great.
That's being asked to live it rather than simply intellectualize it.
And how we react is a measure of our closeness to the Truth.

> Fourth:  Thoa, it may be perfectly legitimate in some ideal world
> to say "Give whatever is asked of you, from the heart, without
> taking any thought."  But that is not reasonable advice for the
> real world we are living in.  I feel pressured by such comments
> to join the fundraising campaign, and stigmatized by negative
> remarks about those who do not contribute.

And so do I, KPJ.  Thank goodness.  It means we're not numb, not
completely lost, still working on ascending.  And it illustrates the
paradox and pain of this process.....in the world of our dreams, giving
whatever is asked, from the heart, without fear or selfishness, would be
no problem as the strength of belief in the Abundance, in the Cause and
Effect, that we would be OK whatever we gave, would see us through.
Failing that Utopia, we are tasked with sharing the responsibility and
making a decision and living with our "conscience".

> This has all raised my consciousness about several issues, and
> for that I'm grateful.  But the way the issue has affected
> discourse on the list makes me uncomfortable with continuing
> here.

Can you not be grateful and stay?  Does everyone on the List have to be
perfect?  Can't we learn as we List?
Love
Annette