Theos-Talk Archives (June 1998 Message tt00355)

June 15th

Dear Kym:

You are right our "feelings" all get tweaked -- I think that's
how they grow and sort themselves out on a basis of value and
importance.

 It always seemed to me that I could "look at my feelings."  And
while recognizing that they grab me, yet I seem to be separate
from them, and can "handle" them.  So I accepted the Theosophical
idea that they were a separate part of my make-up and while close
to the mind, they were not part of it.

[  I live in a body (but I don't know it well so I leave it to
handle its own affairs);

I have "feelings, desires and emotions."  I see them come and go
and sometimes they make sense and sometimes they are exaggerated
and if allowed to continue unchecked I could get into very "hot"
water.  So I check them.

But who or what in me does the checking ?  Is it the "mind,
thinking ?  To some extent I would say yes,  But I know that I
can change my mind and, so to say, switch it on to work on a
different subject that I select for it.  So the mind is also a
"tool".

And by now I am no closer to knowing WHO I AM.  Except that I
exist inside ( or is it over or outside, the body ?)

Theosophy offers as a solution the idea that there is a "ray" of
the ONE UNIVERSAL SPIRIT that is resident in, around, above me,
and is the ultimate ME.  How does this grab you ?  If there is a
"universal god-spirit, a deity, perhaps a part of IT resides in
me too, as logically it is everywhere.  Question:  then why are
we not better than we are ?
I would like to know too !  But why is it that we have these
yearnings and longings for something "better."  Where do they
come from ?  What are the virtues, the ideals, the nobility, the
unselfishness the altruism aspects of our mystical "feelings ?"

Now, if something can be changed, then there is a "changer"
inside.  That's what I want to meet and make sure that I
understand.  am I it ?

I have always found it difficult to analyze others or to attempt
to define them, because it seems to me that all of us are
changing, and the persona we meet today, may have changed
attitude and position by "tomorrow."  I can see this happening in
myself.  I can only guess it happens in others.

So I don't "give up"  but try to understand.  Also if we try to
talk, and I am quite poor at dialog, really (in my esteem) I
often come out as Thoa:O expressed and sound "preachy."  So if it
can be understood that  is only my asking things, and not making
it sound like it was carved in stone, I might be getting
somewhere.

As Pooh would say:  "Bother !."  And Piglet would say:  "Have
some haycorns with your honey."

Best wishes:            Dallas

> Date: Sunday, June 14, 1998 3:16 PM
> From: "Kym Smith" <kymsmith@micron.net>
> Subject: "Humans Being"

>Thoa wrote to Dallas:
>
>>Kym is doing fine the way she is.  She does not need any
directing in how
>>she should write.  I enjoyed her posts immensely.  She's one of
the people
>>whose posts I go directly to when they're up.
>
>I appreciate your words, Thoa.  In the "Big Picture" sphere, it
is inspiring
>and courageous for someone to stand up for something they
believe in or,
>conversely, to battle against an injustice.  In the "Personal"
theatre, I
>felt affirmed and valued after reading your post.
>
>In addition, as I believe you noted in further postings, Dallas
responded to
>your post gracefully, quickly, and sincerely.  That, too, is
quite commendable.
>
>As far as my reaction to Dallas' (and other folks) posts to me -
sometimes
>my feelings get tweaked; sometimes I experience the greatest of
merriment;
>sometimes I think "Whew, I'm glad I'm not as dumb as they are!";
sometimes I
>think "People are so much smarter than me - this is clearly my
first
>incarnation."; sometimes I think "Well, I whooped that snippy
person but
>good with my witty retorts!"; sometimes I think "Dear God, if
you love me
>and I promise never to giggle at a funeral again, please have
that post I
>just sent to the list get lost forever in cyberspace.";
sometimes I think
>"Now this post will truly show my brilliance and people will be
blinded in
>awe by the light of my wisdom!"
>
>And then someone will say "We need to quit being so
self-centered - that is
>what T/theosophy is all about."  And then I think. . "Oh,
bummer.  Well,
>what the avitchi am I supposed to write and do now?"
>
>
>Kym
>
>
>
>