Theos-Talk Archives (October 2002 Message tt00190)

Hi. Here is a message which I just sent to another forum, but it can apply to this forum, also. This is not intended as a response to any of the material posted today, as I have not read the new emails yet.----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Hi. I have promised this message from some time ago. I have been interested in spiritual writing for very many years and have made many fledgling attempts to communicate to others certain material I have considered valuable I have also read many of the great spiritual writings of humanity. I believe it can generally be demonstrated to be a fact that most spiritual writing, no matter how magnificent, goes in one ear and out the other unless there is some deliberate attempt to SET this material into the individuality of ones own functioning. This includes, for me, some of my personal favorites, among many others, the Tao, the Gospel of John, and the Zen Teaching of Huang Po, as well as the writings of Krishnamurti and certain Indian and Tibetan Buddhist texts.

It is my experience that when I truly understand a certain concept or principle, it becomes a part of me in a way that is my own, and I am able to express it in my own words in such a way that it is unique and alive. This means that when I communicate with others, it is my personal aim to take words and to consciously arrange them in a configuration that is specially tailored to fit each situation in a way that is as unique and special as a pair of shoes that is made, with love, by a shoemaker to fit a certain kind of foot. Each shoe has a special sole on it that will touch the earth in such a way that when a person walks, he will be best able to connect to the larger universe in a way that is CONSCIOUS. Each group of people, just like each foot, has a certain unique shape and also a certain unique time and location, which can be equated to a climate. A shoemaker will not make a pair of hiking boots for someone who is living in a tropical climate, or a pair of sandals for someone who needs shoes in the middle of winter. The joy and the wonder of each situation is unique and time -appropriate. 

I have tried again and again over the years to share with others spiritual ideas I have read about, but did not fully understand. This has included trying to imprint one of my own children with ideas and concepts of great value and importance in such a way that she built up such a stubborn resistance that she may never be able to receive them. This is sad. I have also given out spiritual material in a way that was so mechanical that it lost both its force and its subtle precious nuance, because I was so eager to share and hopefully re-experience my original thrill at discovering this material, that I made this material not only cheap, but presented it in a way that went in one ear and out the other without GRIP.

I have been very fortunate in my life to have known a few human beings who were able to give me something that was uniquely tailored to my form and the form of the situation in such a way that I could receive it not just in my mind or in my feelings, but in both of these and also in my physical body in a way that it became multi-dimensional. This enabled me to experience an act of love that was not mechanical, but conscious. Someone truly saw me AS I AM and made something special for me that fit me. This is a real gift, and I have cried tears of gratitude.

There are so many people in this group that I am not quite sure if I were to make a special pair of shoes, how I would shape it. Perhaps if more people come out here and speak of their own experiences and voice their own inner questions, and we share our experiences and questions together, the shape of something special will be gradually revealed so that together we can make a pair of shoes so magical that it will fit each one of us as an individual at the same time it will fit all of us. 

If your words are fumbling and not perfect, I would love to hear them because they are your own and they are honest. If you choose your words in such a way that they are not just to "help" me, "express" yourself, or release steam, I will learn how to do the same. In this way we can be attentive to both ourselves and others when we speak. If we are able to create a special atmosphere here, perhaps this atmosphere will become alive in a way that something sacred in each of us can connect and touch others in our daily lives.

I have written of my own experience in my own words. I did not read these words in a book, though perhaps certain words in a book have touched me so deeply that through fumbling practice and experimentation, I was eventually able to grip them in such a way that they became my own. Because I have written these words, and there is a potential for many hundreds of people to read them, I feel that I have a responsibility to go into the rest of my day, both in my tasks at home, and also out in the world, as if I am wearing a special kind of shoes on my feet, This means to me that when the soles of the shoes which contain my physical feet touch the earth, I will feel this. A simple beginning for a simple person who is not fully aware most of the time. Thanks for inspiring me to become more so. Sincerely, Wry




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