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Jun 03, 1998 00:58 AM
by Thoa Thi-Kim Tran

>Your post sent me running for an old issue of Parabola (Summer 1995).
>Here's the cover page quote from Satish Kumar:
>"When you accept the state of being a stranger, you are no longer a
>I have been an exile when everything around me seemed strange and everybody
>was a stranger.  Once I accepted that I didn't have to belong and I didn't
>have to
>be part of the world, then I was free to be part of it.  There was a
>paradoxical release of the spirit.  The world became mine when I was no
>longer holding on to it."
>Finding that ideal group is like finding the ideal mate--some will swear
>that it's happened for them, others are convinced that it's just around the
>corner (or up in the Himalayans), and the rest of us scoff it off as just a
>romantic notion.  Like relationships, our expectations of groups can be too
>high:  passionate discussion without negative emotions; hotly defended
>arguments without judgements or slurs.  Groups get disfunctional just like
>relationships and damaged groups, like relationships, can be salvaged with
>work and love.
>my $.02

Bingo!  I wanted to respond to Paul's post but was short on time.  I just
came to that realization myself.  I had to do some soul searching these
last few months.  Here I am, in the golden position of not having to deal
with a boss or a corporate institution, and I chose to be in a martial arts
program that is rigid and traditional.  I pay someone to make me feel like
a kid.  I quit two months ago and am now taking Muay Thai boxing.  The
atmosphere is relaxed.  The schedule is variable, so that I can attend
whenever I want.  I was ecstatic.  I am also reevaluating having to be in
any theosophical societies.  Just seeing how people love to tell other
people what to do on this list, condemning others, and basically not
respecting their interests, I decided to put wanting to belong to a
physical group out of my mind.  If I want to be of service, I can do so
without all the other SHOULDS associated with such a group.  If I want to
be scholarly, I don't have people telling me I should be of service.  As if
being scholarly means you won't be of service.  I can use big words, little
words, and nonsense jokes.  I can chose to eat or not eat meat.  Why would
anyone want to be in a group that does not respect a person's freedom to
choose?  Hasn't anyone heard of the trend of positive affirmations?  Anyone
who tried to say positive affirmations to themselves should also realize
that they should positively affirm someone else.  YOU ARE ALRIGHT!  Try to
be free, it feels great!  Anyhoow, I'll stay on the theosophical lists
because I am into theosophy and the three objects.  I also made some good
friends with like minds.

To Paul:  You belong to yourself.  Enjoy your freedom.  Anytime you're
miserable about something, it could be that something or someone is not
respecting you.  If that is the case, do whatever you feel like, or get
away from the oppressive environment.  In a country in which nobody's
holding a gun to your head (generally), you are the creator of your own

Thoa :o)

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